F-you!
Why would you wait until i was 29 to cause me so much pain? I've never had to deal with allergies...okay well maybe that one year where I was allergic to chocolate and broke out in hives every time Iwould eat some which was quite often cause I really like chocolate. But other than that one span of 12 calendar months I've never had allergies. And now for the last three weeks my nose and eyes have been assaulted in the worst way. What have I done to you Sir Allergy? Did I offend you in some way? Did I drive by you while it was raining and you were on the bus stop and splash you unknowingly? Did I come to your house uninvited and eat your last bag of chips in the pantry? Did I call dibs on your creamsicle and lick it so that you wouldn't want it? No? Then why the hell are my eyes itchy?
Why is my nose draining?
Why am I feeling so fatigued? Why am I chewing Sudafed like candy every 6 hours? You suck allergies!!! I hope one day you're leaving your house on your way to work (assaulting some other poor fool) and some stray dog saunters by and drops a load on your new pair of shoes, and I hope they are suede so no matter how many times you clean them they still smell like stray dog poop. which smells much worse than domesticated dog poop because stray dogs eat things like dead alley rats and the leftover taco meat in the dumpster behind Taco Bell. On my list of things to hate you rate a close third behind oatmeal and mop water. You sir are a A** Clown.
Sincerely,
Me
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